Reflective Listening Practice: A Four-Week Communication Exercise
Purpose: This four-week exercise is designed to help you improve your reflective listening skills, enhancing your ability to engage in meaningful conversations and build stronger relationships. Each week, you will focus on practicing a specific skill.
Week 1: Reflection of Content
Description: Reflection of content involves repeating or summarising what the other person has said to show understanding and encourage further conversation. It helps the speaker feel heard and validated.
Example:
Speaker: “I had a really tough day at work today; there was so much to do.”
Listener: “It sounds like your workload was overwhelming today.”
Your Task: This week, practise reflecting the content of conversations. Try summarising or paraphrasing what someone says before responding.
Week 2: Clarification
Description: Clarification involves asking follow-up questions to ensure you understand the speaker’s message accurately. It also encourages the speaker to elaborate.
Example:
Speaker: “I don’t know if I should take the new job offer.”
Listener: “Are you feeling unsure about the job itself, or are you worried about the transition?”
Your Task: Throughout the week, practise asking clarifying questions when someone shares information. Aim to gain a clearer understanding rather than assuming meaning.
Week 3: Reflection of Emotion
Description: Reflection of emotion involves identifying and verbalising the feelings behind someone’s words. This helps the speaker feel acknowledged and understood on a deeper level.
Example:
Speaker: “I can’t believe my friend forgot my birthday.”
Listener: “That sounds really disappointing. You must have felt hurt.”
Your Task: Pay close attention to the emotions behind what people say this week. Reflect back what you hear about how they feel, not just what they say.
Week 4: Validation
Description: Validation acknowledges another person’s feelings as understandable, even if you don’t necessarily agree. It reassures the speaker that their feelings are real and important.
Example:
Speaker: “I’m really nervous about my upcoming presentation.”
Listener: “It makes sense that you’re feeling nervous—it’s a big event, and you care about doing well.”
Your Task: This week, practise validating emotions and experiences when people express concerns or struggles. Offer understanding and reassurance.
Final Reflection
At the end of the four weeks, take a moment to reflect on how these exercises have influenced your conversations. Which skill felt most natural? Which was most challenging? How have these practices improved your communication?
Bonus Challenge
Continue using all four skills in everyday conversations and notice how they impact your relationships.
By practising these skills, you will become a more engaged listener and improve the depth and quality of your conversations. Happy listening!
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